This is my life, I'm terribly sorry by the way.
Published on November 13, 2003 By draedan In Welcome
Let's see...This is my first Blog, moreover my first Blog entry. I have to admit I have no idea what to say, how to say it, I hope anything I have is somewhat entertaining to you readers out there. *Scratches chin* ~What would they like to hear?~ Oh, here we go, a story from my earlier years of high school.

ATTENTION- Those warnings before "Jackass" about not trying stuff because of danger are NOT TO BE TAKEN LIGHTLY!

My friends are, I love em to death but, lacking in any form of common sense. So, my buddy jeff takes out his video camera and says "Let's do jackass shit, it'll be fuckin hilarious!" Yeah well, My friend Ryan, the big football stud, suits up and runs full speed at a god damn oak tree! Four fast steps and "SMACK" and a light groan, all 220 lbs. of him was laid out flat, be he didn't stop there. This next part requires you have a bit of history on him. His head, literally is made of Rock, or kevlar or something like adamantium. We began walking around my caul-de-sac, trying to think of things to do, unknown to me, that I am a secret target for the next stunt. All of a sudden, the two hundred pound gorilla steps behind me, I hear the word "Now" and a loud sound like someone knocking on wood. That knock was Ryan's skull making an indentation in mine. Ten feet away the camera picked up the sound, I just fell down, threw up (I don't know the reason why...just happened.) and keeled over seeing stars. Oh but I got him back oh yeah. I walked to the gas station with my friend Andy who was consoling me considering I had almost been knocked unconcious, he says "Pound that vodka and throw up on Ryan!" For some reason, that Idea appealed to me. When we returned, all the guys crowded around me, leaving Ryan to play basketball by himself. Behind that wall of buddies, I started to chug straight smirnoff vodka, warm I might add. "Hey Ryan check this out!" They called to him, and sure enough he came running, as soon as he approached, they spread out and I hurled a projectile of vomit all over his chest. It was one of the funniest things in the world to me. I threw up all over one of my best friends on purpose. I stood up to the big muscled bully. And honestly...right after, I ran like HELL!
Comments
No one has commented on this article. Be the first!